The garden

　Well it's more like I procrastinated writing here again。。。I thought this was really stupid of me to put an effort into so I just left it to rot for a good 2 months I think。Most of the time I lose the motivation or the line of thought to write what I wanted to write here so I'm just gonna try to wing it every time I remember I have this site, which is today。

　　So maybe I start with the things I remember being proud of in the last two months。

　　I finished drawing 3 OC artworks back in August。Well, two of them are for my friend and I'm really happy how they turned out! I plan on printing these out as photocards hehe, I've already ordered some deco stickers for the ID holder I'm gonna put these photocards in; did you know I made like decorated ID holders for my OBM photocards? They're really cute in my shrine/shelf。I made more for my friend for their OBM photocards too, then I'm gonna try decorating new ones for these OC photocards。

　　Man, I got so much to gift, it's been piling up in my storage box。BUT the photocards are gonna be the last thing to add to the gift box to finalize it, so it's gonna be like a christmas gift at this point lol。However。。。

　　I do worry, what if my friend had already moved on from these things。。。 that's on me though, I haven't spoken to them properly for months now, it's bad, I know, I just。。。 I don't know。I'm making up excuses aren't I? I keep doing this, ghosting my friends for months on end just because I didn't want to disappoint them for being so。。 not me。。。I miss talking to my friends I really do and I hate myself for just not talking to them。Is this gift thing I put so much effort to is a measely apology gift? I don't know, it's not supposed to be, I just want to gift them the things that made me think of them。It's been my thing to gift my friends。

　　Moving on I guess, I'm not supposed to wallow on my overthinking here but eh。Maybe my next thing I wanted to share isn't something I should be proud of but hey, my Mama didn't question my spending on her taobao account lmao。

　　So my fever on nendoroid started again back in June or July because I found these faceplates that looks SO MUCH like barbsian so I made an impulse buy。。。fast forward I made barbsian nendoroid dolls! Hehe。。。

　　Though I became antsy to finish customizing their hair。。 which really hindered my progress on my CM work。I skipped August because I got tired of finishing the personal art I did but then I focused on barbsian nendo hair in September。。。I tried recording my process but I got really upset with how I worked on it because I had to redo EVERYTHING when I realized just how bad my paint job were。It went well at least! Lysias's hair was the hardest to make color match with and I did my best, both of barbsian's hair were just a slight hue difference from what I wanted it to be but they look perfect already so I left it at that。

　　I'm holding myself back from continuing my nendo project of making RAD uniforms clothes next, it's my only motivator lately to finish my CM work。Next year I'll do demon forms。。。 I already asked for my Mama to order me these small doll wings for Lysias haha。

　　I also ordered this DIY chibigurumi print of barbsian, it took me about a full day to sew each doll。I messed up pretty badly at the stitching, at least they're still matching in that way hehe。My attachment to barbsian is strong and seeing these dolls I made makes me really happy, they took up my shrine space nicely and I think I'm good now at collecting merch。Maybe that's just me who just really wants to work on the nendo clothes next lolll。

　　It really helps me to get through my responsibilities and misfortune。I'm upset at how PHLPost failed my US deliveries and like 10 of the packages are being sent back to me without any reason why so like wtf??? I have to take up the costs of reshipment myself and I'm low key hoping my customers take pity on me and help with the SF costs somehow since I'm gonna use a different courier TT。It sucks because that just killed my motivation for making merch, maybe next year I feel better about it and continue the merch plans I wanted to do。。。 I mean, I already have my dakimakuras so。。。

　　Eh that's about it, from what I can remember anyways, heres to hoping I get to talk to my friends again before my birthday。